Editor's note: Typically, KLCC reporters aren't active participants in the stories they cover. For this assignment, we made an exception. Kendra Schertell attended a "Girl Group" event as both a reporter and as a community member who was interested in the concept.
I walked through the doors of Round1 at the Valley River Center, looking for the group I had signed up to meet. As my eyes adjusted to the change in light, I noticed a group of women standing together, deep in conversation. My stomach dropped. They didn’t sound like strangers making small talk: They sounded like a close group of friends.
In my mid-20s, I left California–and with it, the friends I’d known for years–to attend the University of Oregon. Of course, I met new people in Eugene through school and work, but the deep, long-standing friendships I was used to were suddenly so far away.
Standing there at Round1, I could feel the weight of that absence.
Staying in touch with friends back home had been easy enough through video calls and texting, but it doesn’t change the fact that most of my close relationships live far away. That’s probably why friending apps and events have become more prevalent.
I’ve never been into the idea of meeting people online. But one evening while scrolling through social media, I came across a video about a local group that organizes events for women looking to make friends. A few weeks later, I found myself at Round1.
It can be hard to make friends
Girl Group started in Los Angeles in 2024 and came to Oregon not long after, when member Abigail Partin asked if she could bring the concept with her during her move to Eugene. Partin now runs the local chapter, organizing events designed to help women meet and spend time together.
“The whole purpose is for women to be able to have fun experiences and make new friends,” Partin said. “Because making friends as an adult is hard—harder than it needs to be.”
The group operates on a membership model, though tickets are available to everyone for certain events. Each month, members can choose to participate in a variety of activities, including hiking, crafting, book clubs, and social outings. Partin explained that having set plans takes the pressure off.
“You just have to show up. And for the most part, we’re doing some kind of activity. So if conversation feels uncomfortable, you have something to do,” she said. “It also has a start and end time, usually. You go in knowing how long you’re going to be there, so if it’s not going well, you don’t have to awkwardly find a way to dip out.”
Those days of running up to someone and asking them to be your friend are long gone; as an adult it takes time and effort. Girl Group didn’t sound like a childish attempt to find a friend, but rather, an experience.
So I decided to embrace that experience by signing up for karaoke. Am I a singer? No. I chose this activity thinking that a group willing to sing karaoke together might be more open and welcoming.
That’s how I found myself in the arcade, walking over to Abigail Partin and the group of women. The strangers I had hoped to meet seemed to know each other well, and for a moment, I wondered if I was the only new person there.
That feeling didn’t last long. Someone turned toward me, introduced herself, and pulled me into the conversation. Partin said the group is good about being inclusive.
“Everyone’s there to make friends even if they’ve been to a ton of events,” she said. “It’s not ‘Oh I’ve made my friends and I’m only spending time with my friends.’ It’s ‘I’m here to have a good time and meet new people.’”
Sparking conversations
Once we got to the karaoke room and settled in, light conversation continued, partially in an attempt to avoid being the first to sing. Karaoke in a private room is much different than karaoke at a bar. Large crowds in dimly lit spaces, often fueled by alcohol, can take the edge off the nerves of performing.
In this intimate, brightly lit room, Partin bravely kicked off the singing with “Pink Pony Club” by Chappell Roan and encouraged the rest of us to join in. She rallied the group together and was the first to put herself out there, helping ease the nerves of those who followed.
Partin is present at every event, from planning and participating, to posting on social media. She does receive compensation for her work, but admitted that it’s not enough to go full-time, so she considers this to be more of a passion project.
“This is a job that doesn’t feel like a job,” she said. “Which is why I originally wanted to be an actor, so I’ve been trying to find what that thing is and I feel like I found that with Girl Group.”
Soon after the first song, everyone seemed comfortable enough to sing. I held back, hoping to build up the nerve. As a nosy journalist, I rarely struggle to make conversation, but singing in front of strangers felt like a different kind of vulnerability.
Normally, when I would do karaoke, I’d have my musically-inclined friend come with me to help cover for my less than perfect pitch.
I shouldn’t have been surprised, but everyone there had a pretty great singing voice. I almost didn’t sign up, but I reminded myself that getting outside of my comfort zone was part of the point. So I sang “These Boots Are Made For Walkin’” by Nancy Sinatra.
It wasn’t great, but I did it.
The selections ranged from songs by the Black Eyed Peas to Carole King, and the choices sparked conversation throughout the room. Some women chatted while others sang, occasionally pausing to listen and shout encouragement. The conversations stayed relatively surface-level, low-pressure and not too personal.
Partin said having an activity helps conversations flow naturally and allows friendships to build over time. It’s a different approach than apps like Bumble BFF or events like speed friending, which often require participants to keep conversations going and make follow-up plans.
“I feel like with the Girl Group events, you have an entire event to kind of thaw out if you’re feeling uncomfortable,” she said. “From then on, you’re getting to know them at every single event that you go to. Instead of trying to see if you like this person and then making plans with them again. You don’t have to worry about that, you just go to the events that are interesting to you and over time you build those relationships with people.”
Even though I was quite uncomfortable singing, some people seemed to really open up through music, revealing pieces of their personality. They found others who shared their love of Taylor Swift or Disney, and from there, conversations grew more meaningful.
“There are a lot of people who have joined and tell me that they have social anxiety, and that they’re really grateful for Girl Group, and the events, and being able to just show up to things,” Partin said.
When the time was up, some people slipped out quickly, while others lingered to finish conversations. Some women exchanged socials, and others talked about the next meetup.
I hadn’t driven to the event, so a couple of the women offered me–and another attendee–a ride. When I declined because I already had someone coming to pick me up, they waited outside with me to make sure I got home safely.
While I didn’t leave with a new best friend, I felt better knowing I could show up to an activity, join a group of women, and feel part of a community.
Making friends as an adult can be difficult, but it doesn’t have to be singing-in-front-of-strangers difficult. Maybe next time, I’ll make it easier on myself and sign up for a crafting event.
