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Arts & Culture

Pot-Based Dinnerware Line Could Nip Two Oregon Issues In The Bud

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Pot-Pots Unlimited.
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Oregon has two problems: one, restrictions by China have caused a glut in recyclable materials.  Two, federal restrictions on marijuana sales have caused a massive surplus of weed within the state.  As KLCC’s Brian Bull reports, one startup company says it has a solution.

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Credit Pot-Pots Unlimited.
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Factory manager Grady Heines shuttles a few boxes of Pot-Pots Unlimited cookware towards the loading dock. He expects sales to be big.

At a factory on Eugene’s north side, a stamping machine pops out dark green utensils, plates, kettles, and cups onto a conveyor belt. 

“Here at Pot-Pots Unlimited, we’re taking all the excess marijuana we can find, and refining it into a dense, plastic-like material," explains factory manager Grady Heines.

"And whether it’s a tray, a mug, a spoon, or salad plate...it’s all edible!  Like this fork!  (CRUNCH) Pretty tasty!"

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Credit Pot-Pots Unlimited.
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Refinery specialist Sheila McGrant shows a tank where cannabis is broken down and converted into a dense, tarry substance that shares many properties similar to plastic. It is then pressed into a number of shapes including utensils and containers.

Heines says his product will replace all the inedible plastic cups and plates piling up in garbage bins across Oregon. And use up all the surplus weed local growers can’t sell.

"It’s farm-to-table in a new light," beams Heines, gesturing at the hour's inventory.

"I’d imagine eating this marijuana crockery would give you an eventual case of the munchies, so…maybe better to eat the dishes before the food itself!" I say.

"Heh! Maybe. Or just have seconds, right?" laughs Heines.

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Credit Pot-Pots Unlimited.
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Pot-Pots Unlimited plates get a quick rinse in a tank that removes excess, non-toxic dyes. They are then dried, polished, and sent to the distribution and boxing center. Colors/flavors represented (from L to R) are Stinky Pink, Super Lemon Haze, Green Crack, and Blue Dreams Plus.

Pot-Pots Unlimited edible utensils and dishes come in several colors including Acapulco Gold, Purple Haze, or Basic Bud Green. Orders are being taken by marketing firm April, Thules & Day.

For KLCC News, I'm Brian Bull in Eugene.

Editor's note: If the story's airdate or the closing reference to the marketing firm didn't tip you off, you've been pranked! April Fools!  Sad to say that no Pot-Pots Unlimited exists.  However, there are cannabis edibles on the market, and plastic-like materials made of either cannabis or hemp, not to mention corn.  So maybe an edible, cannabis-derived line of dinnerware isn't that far from the realm of possibility?  The mind boggles.  In the meantime, special thanks to local actor Blake Beardsley, for playing the part of Grady Heines, Pot-Pots Unlimited's factory floor manager.  And further thanks to KLCC's volunteer reporter, Aubrey Bulkeley, who was the authoritative voice booming over the factory PA system. 

Copyright 2019, KLCC. 

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